CODE OF CONDUCT

A code of conduct is a set of rules outlining the social norms, religious rules and responsibilities of, and or proper practices for, an individual (Wikipedia).

The first code of conduct issued to mankind, was to Adam and Eve, in the Garden of Eden.

I have always been fascinated with Adam and Eve’s story, particularly how they made their decision in abiding by the set rule.

What rule where they tasked with? See Genesis 2.

And out of the ground the Lord God made every tree grow that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. The tree of life was also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, “Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat; but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”

It is common knowledge, as to what transpired eventually. The devil, through the serpent, tempted Eve to eat of the only tree for which she and her husband were forbidden from eating- the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Yet, at their convenience, was the tree of life, which awaited their interest. Clearly, the forbidden attracts. It sends a wild sense of adventure and temptation. They had the choice to choose either life or death. The temptation was much than they could contend with. Based on their attraction to that which was forbidden and had obvious dire consequences, they invariably chose death. Thankfully, Jesus has erased that to offer eternal life.

At the basic level, abiding by a set code of conduct acts as a guide in life or professional practice. It seeks to steer you in the right direction upon which you would build your mark and imprint on life.

A code of conduct is like a measuring scale that weighs you to determine your placement. Those who are comfortable with the prevailing code go steps further to establish their personal or family values; values that would ingrain a standard for their lives and behaviors.

Take interest in the code of conduct around you … at home, in the work place, public places etc. They are not meant to be restrictive of suffocating, but rather serve as a compass to guide you. If the forbidden looms large, do well to note the temptation and take heed!

God bless!

Titi Horsfall

TRUE SELF-EXPRESSION

At the onset of my literary journey, was a burning desire to express my thoughts and self. Wasn’t much of a talker, but found great ease in writing. I turned to poetry.

I read a lot of old English poems. By old, I mean 18th/19th century writers. I loved John Keats and Lord Byron. I fell in love with Jane Austen’s works; witty, clever banter and lovely exchanges amongst the characters. I read Shakespeare and adored the archaic English with its heady dose of figurative language. In the background, I was reading psalms and singing hymns in our local church. For the latter, I was amazed at the poetic ensemble!

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Why We Need More Women Leaders Pt. 2

I join women the world over, to celebrate the International Women’s Day. Keying into the pledge for parity, I pledge to help women and girls achieve their ambitions #IWD2016.

In Part 1 of this topic, I explored the myth regarding women’s roles. Now, it is time to face our reality.

Profile and Reputation

Selecting one to run for either the exalted office of the president of a country, or the position of an office clerk, requires background check. When applying for a job, assessors want to know where that person has worked or been, and the backlog of experiences. Some visa applications require evidence of past travel, financial history, employment status, family records etc. Exam records are reviewed in selecting candidates for academic admission. With appropriate records, opportunities surface for attention. The apples become quite low hanging.

With the required profile in place, any woman can aspire for greater things.

Leaning In

In Sheryl Sandberg’s book Lean In: Women, Work and The Will To Lead, she encourages women to overcome the “anxieties and preconceptions that stop women reaching the top- taking a place at the table, and making yourself a part of the debate.”

I totally agree, and would emphasize that when a woman seeks to be heard, it is not within the ambits of combat, defying status quo, nor arrogance. A woman leaning in, should seek to project & share opinion, listen, converse and exchange ideas.

The greatest barrier(s) that women have to face are the misconceptions and stereotypes that are thrown their way.

To be seen and not heard.

To live without purpose.

This notwithstanding, there are women leaders who have blazed several trails; and many women require their mentorship. Some unknowingly, take for granted the open doors now available to them. Sandberg states, “We stand on the shoulders of the women who came before us, women who had to fight for the rights that we now take for granted.”

Let me leave you with a quote by the First Lady of the United States of America; Michelle Obama.

“When you’ve worked hard, and done well, and walked through that doorway of opportunity, you do not slam it shut behind you. You reach back.”

To our female trail blazers, please reach back and support women who desire to take that small step of faith into dignified womanhood.

I pledge to help women and girls achieve their ambitions.

#IWD2016

WORLD BOOK DAY 2016

 

Thursday, 3rd March 2016, is World Book Day.

“World Book Day is a celebration! It’s a celebration of authors, illustrators, books and (most importantly) it’s a celebration of reading. In fact, it’s the biggest celebration of its kind, designated by UNESCO as a worldwide celebration of books and reading, and marked in over 100 countries all over the world.” (www.worldbookday.com)

In the course of the first week in March, several activities have been lined up by schools, libraries, and organizations to encourage reading. On the 5th of March, Terra Kulture, Lagos is organizing a Book Reading.  I would meet with the Association of Nigerian Authors (Lagos State Chapter) for the reading of my novels; Influence of a King and From an Orphan to a Queen: Esther.

What are your plans? To get the celebration going, I have complied 25 memorable quotes on books. Enjoy.

  • “There is more treasure in books than in all the pirates’ loot on Treasure Island and best of all, you can enjoy these riches every day of your life.” (Walt Disney Company)

 

  • “If we encounter a man of rare intellect, we should ask him what books he reads.” (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

 

  • “I think of life as a good book. The further you get into it, the more it begins to make sense.” (Harold Kushner)

 

  • “There are many little ways to enlarge your child’s world. Love of books is the best of all.” (Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis)

 

  • “Any book that helps a child to form a habit of reading, to make reading one of his deep and continuing needs, is good for him.” (Maya Angelou)

 

 

  • “There are perhaps no days of our childhood we lived so fully as those we spent with a favorite book.” (Marcel Proust)

 

  • “If one cannot enjoy reading a book over and over again, there is no use in reading it at all.” (Oscar Wilde)

 

  • “A great book should leave you with many experiences, and slightly exhausted at the end. You live several lives while reading.” (William Styron)

 

  • “You know you’ve read a good book when you turn the last page and feel a little as if you have lost a friend.” (Paul Sweeney)

 

  • “If there is a book that you want to read, but it hasn’t been written yet, you must be the one to write it.” (Toni Morrison)

 

  • “I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of library.” (Jorge Luis Borges)

 

  • “I declare after all there is no enjoyment like reading! How much sooner one tires of anything than of a book! — When I have a house of my own, I shall be miserable if I have not an excellent library.” (Jane Austen)

 

  • “Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers.” (Charles William Eliot)

 

  • “In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.” (Mark Twain)

 

 

  • “Many people, myself among them, feel better at the mere sight of a book.” (Jane Smiley)

 

  • “Reading was my escape and my comfort, my consolation, my stimulant of choice: reading for the pure pleasure of it, for the beautiful stillness that surrounds you when you hear an author’s words reverberating in your head.” (Paul Auster)

 

  • “That’s the thing about books. They let you travel without moving your feet.” (Jhumpa Lahiri)
  • “Books are my friends, my companions. They make me laugh and cry and find meaning in life.” (Christopher Paolini)

 

 

  • “It doesn’t matter. I have books, new books, and I can bear anything as long as there are books.” (Jo Walton)

 

  • “A house without books is like a room without windows.” (Horace Mann)

 

  • “Once you have read a book you care about, some part of it is always with you.” (Louis L’Amour)

 

  • “Be awesome! Be a book nut!” ( Seuss)

Why We Need More Women Leaders Pt. 1

The myth about women’s roles

We have grown up with stories such as Cinderella, Rapunzel, and Sleeping Beauty- all portraying the beautiful, helpless girl who is rescued from an uncertain future by a dashing, fearless and very handsome prince. He sweeps her off her feet, they fall heads over heels in love, and they live together happily ever after.

I love a good, sensible love story, but would we not be stretching it too far, if in reality, we expect all females to be clueless as to how to build their future? Should we admire the female who cannot see past the flutter of her eyelashes and then, brandish the opposite a feminist? Why should parents dedicate themselves to having their daughters educated, and in expectation, should expect NOTHING?

Elizabeth Gilbert stated, “I was not rescued by a prince; I was the administrator of my own rescue”. The animated movie Brave appears to be an attempt to deviate from the image of the fairytale stereotypical female.

 Today’s Woman

More females are taking up critical roles in society and in the boardroom. Young girls deserve to have more of these role models, to inspire and encourage them in their own growth and development.

Picking up a copy of the Harvard Business Review, the cover of a silhouetted female looms, with the caption:

Emotional, Bossy, Too Nice

The biases that still hold female leaders back- and how to over come them. If there is a single barrier that affects all women, its exclusion from networks and conversations that open doors to further development and promotions.

 Below, are some quotes from the magazine:

 

“I was often the only woman or Asian sitting around a table of senior executives. I experienced plenty of meetings outside my organization with large groups of executives, where people assumed that I couldn’t be the boss, even though I was.” – Andrea Jung (Former CEO of Avon).

“My mother was one of eight children. She used to be a very brilliant student, and when the time came to go to college, she wanted to become a doctor. Unfortunately, her mother had to explain to her that there was not enough money in the family, and that the money for college was going to the boys and the girls would instead have to marry. After hearing that story, I said I would never do anything to hurt someone based on segregation” – Carlos Ghosn

(CEO of Nissan Motor Company)

“I believe very strongly that whatever barriers race presents in the workforce, they pale in comparison to the barriers that women face when creating the close monitoring relationships that are necessary to be promoted.”- Ken Frazier

(CEO of Merck).

“Three women on the board made individual comments that were similar in direction, which I didn’t respond to. Not long after they spoke, a fourth person, who happened to be a man, made a comment in line with what the women

had been saying, and I said, ‘I think Jeff’s got it right,’ not even aware of what I had just done. To their great credit, the women didn’t embarrass me publicly.

They pulled me to the side and played it back to me. It was a learning moment for me.”- Jim Turley (CEO of Ernst and Young)

 

To be continued

Buoyed by Grace

Guess you know that feeling of foreboding, as you embark on a journey when only a few days earlier, a major accident had occurred?

When a commercial airline crashed in Nigeria killing most on board, two days later I boarded a commercial flight. At the slightest turbulence, practically everyone on board started praying. The man by my side stared at me in unquantifiable wonder- I seemed calm, and relaxed.
I nodded at him with a smile, and turned my gaze to the headrest before my eyes. If only he knew. I had asked God to literarily assign angels to the key points of that plane!

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Graceful Aging

Advancing in age, in a smooth and attractive manner.

“Her beauty, which transcended time, was shielded with her thick, white tresses like clouds cresting the mountain peaks. Her beauty was such that only the heavens could give, for the turbulent years had not drained her fountain of youth… She recalled the years gone by, the torture of hopelessness she had felt as a child, the relief of religious tolerance in her youth, and as a woman, the unexpected and inexplicable joy of falling in love…”(Excerpt- From an Orphan to a Queen: Esther).

“For length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to thee.” – Proverbs 3:2

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Alabaster Box!

It was one of those laid back Saturday evenings. I rummaged through the satellite TV channels searching for something light to view. I clicked on American X Factor; a singing competition(It was being aired about two weeks after the live performances).

As the lady on the stage addressed the judges, I did my assessment – which is normal, I think, for most viewers. I listened to her voice as she introduced herself. It had good prospects- earthy, rich and stable. When she said she was a fifty-four year old grandmother, I screamed “what!”
I sat up.
With her tall frame, clad in skin-tight black leather, she barely looked thirty years.

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